The fairness theory states that, “Life should always be fair and exactly equal for everyone.” If we have developed too many expectations based upon this “fairness belief,” then we are doomed to a life filled with misery and fear. Scripture helps find a balance: “In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons… To the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves, Jesus” (Ephesians 1:5-6). “You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you” (Isaiah 26:3). In the worst cases, people spend much of their life calculating fairness, balancing what they have received with what they have given, and maintaining some sort of self-created accounting system that is based entirely on ideas of fairness. This fairness belief system may have little association with outside reality. We may also have trouble forgiving ourselves. We might be angry at ourselves because we are still living with the consequences of bad choices we made earlier in our lives. We may think we are so “bad” or ‘stupid” that we don’t deserve to be happy. How can we forgive ourselves for our wrong doings? We may blame our parents or even “God” for making us the kind of people that fail. It may all seem so “unfair.” How do we get over blaming ourselves or others for our misfortunes???
Temperament tendency toward fear???
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